Christian Writers Circle

Did Anyone See His Love In Me Today?

by

Kathleen Shore

“Live every moment as though it were your last….

Love, as though it was your last moment to give His love away….”

     These words to live by from my Dad, passed through my mind as the mundane task of running to Kroger brought a slumped over posture inside of me.

It had been a wonderful morning at church, followed by lunch, and a nap would have really completed the day so nicely. But when you run out of toilet paper, there is no option of going tomorrow.

As the automatic doors opened I silently whispered to Father… “I’m looking for you, I’m listening….” and made my way to a beautiful pile of ripe tomatoes that was not on my list.

Keeping my eye on the perfect ones I wanted, I waited as a woman on the other side of the pile struggled with the plastic bag dispenser. I quickly realized that her difficultly in finding the perforated line gave Father some time to prepare His way in me.

He immediately struck me with His beauty displayed in her…. her straight, jet black hair that still graced her face amidst the exhaustion of her day that began by readying herself and her three daughters (all under the age of 6) in their Sunday best.

Now flooded by His heartbeat, I reached out and pulled the bag. In handing it to her, I recognized the deep pain and loneliness by her response that was so hungry to have a conversation.

So glad to see an uplifted spirit and a smile on her face, we then parted ways. But as I gathered my attention to the avocados, Father corrected me…”You didn’t tell her specifically what I impressed you with…”

Not realizing at the time, that it was more important than just having a great connection, I collected what I needed while praying that Father would allow me to pass by her one more time.

Sure enough, as I rounded the corner at the milk, she stood expressionless in front of the meat department. Maybe pondering which cut was best, maybe struggling to have a clear thought between the random questions from her sweet girls, or maybe, she was so vacant inside she was searching to just have any thought at all….

Coming from behind, I broke in on her vacancy with my hand on her back. “Ma’am, I want to tell you the first thing that came to me when I saw you.”

With just my beginning words, “I was so struck by how beautiful God made you…” tears began to run down her face as she drank in all that Father gave me to share.

Confirming to me that it was important to speak exactly what God wanted, she responded, “I needed to hear those specific words…. I am in the middle of a divorce….”

Oh Father, thank you for the grace to even follow you – The Good Shepherd, thank you for wrecking my heart with your love poured out, thank you that we ran out of toilet paper….

Not that I am doing it well, but I am so convicted by the truth that our lives in Christ are to be lived out through the all-powerful, chain dropping, captive freeing LOVE of God that was poured out for us, and that it is to be the sole purpose of our existence.

For this reason, I must ask the questions that I pose to myself everyday:

Who do I want to be today, no matter what anyone else is doing around me?

Do people around me, SEE the love of Jesus?

Has my “doing” for Him, replaced my “abiding” in His love of me?

Is God’s love of me the power source of all that I do?

Father God, I just want to set my sights on you today…. and let the power of your love, the same love that was poured out through your Son on the cross and the power that raised Him from the dead that now lives in me…. let it invade me and become all that I am, all that I seek, all that comes out of me…. and in that alone, I will fulfill ALL that you have set me forth to do.